My Quirks

There are many times when I wonder if people look at me and question my sexuality.  In fact, often times when I'm in a public setting, whether in a place like a restaurant or even at school, my mind is always racing with internal questions wondering if people are looking at me and judging me.  A little paranoid?  I suppose, but I honestly can't wait until I no longer have to look over my shoulder out of fear of being questioned, as hopefully there will be no need for any more questions in the very near future.

  Anyway, I've been wondering quite a bit here lately about what stereotypes I fit when it comes to being gay, and which ones I do not.  In other words, what are my quirks?  Well, first of all, and I'm not even totally sure if this is too gay or not, but I love reality TV for the most part.  Shows like American Idol, The X Factor, Big Brother, The Celebrity Apprentice, and Survivor I absolutely love, and truth be told I do not know too many other guys who enjoy watching shows like these like I do, although I do have a very straight cousin who watches Big Brother quite a bit.

 Now lets get to my obvious quirks, the stereotypes that fit me like a glove, to use a cliche here.  First of all, I'm not afraid to admit I enjoy watching talk shows.  In fact, I watch shows like The Ellen DeGeneres Show and Oprah (when she was on daytime) in front of my family, and I don't know how they don't question me, even a little bit, as far as my sexuality is concerned.  Who am I kidding, though?  I've said it on here before and I'll say it again, I'm pretty sure many of my relatives are suspicious of me being gay for a variety of reasons, but for whatever reason they do not question me about it.

 Another "gay" thing about me is that I like some "girly" music, though I've always had an eclectic taste when it comes to music.  Having said that, I'll proudly blare some Taylor Swift when riding with family, but I have to admit that I can't help but look at nearby cars when at red lights to see if they are staring at me for jamming out to some T Swift.  So what are some other "gay" things about me, other than the fact that obviously I'm attracted to men?  The last one I'll mention on here, and this is more in my head than anything else, is the way I walk.  I've never been questioned about the way I walk; I don't think anybody looks at the way I walk and thinks that I'm gay; but sometimes when I'm walking by a place where I can see my reflection, I can't help but notice that I seem to sway my arms quite a bit, and to me it just looks like the way a stereotypical, feminine gay man is characterized to walk.  Don't get me wrong.  I'm not walking with flailing arms, but I think it's sort of like a gay man's natural gaydar, where we notice the little things that weigh on us more than they do on others.  Speaking of gaydar, I think I have a pretty solid one, but that's an entirely different topic.

  Anyway, before I get off here, let me say that there is nothing wrong with the stereotypes associated with gay people, although I hate it when people confuse stereotypes with stigmas.  There is nothing wrong with a feminine gay man.  There is nothing wrong with a masculine gay man.  There is nothing wrong with a gay man such as myself, who probably fits somewhere in the middle of the "gay" spectrum.  We are all unique in our own ways, there is no right way to be gay, and at the end of the day, we are just as much men as any of our straight counterparts, whether they believe that or not.  Now that I've shared a little bit more about little ol' me, I'm going to go ahead and get off here for tonight.  I'm supposed to go have lunch with my little brother tomorrow, so hopefully tomorrow will be a good day.  Until next time, I hope everybody is doing well and enjoying life.

Getting Grilled

So, I've mentioned it on here before about my little cousins periodically asking me why I don't have a girlfriend, but what happened the other day took it to a whole other level, one that was awkward and uncomfortable as they grilled me in a packed car with my grandmother.  In hindsight it was definitely funny, but lets just say I sure was sweating during this little interaction between the little brats.  Anyway, it started to look like it was going to storm the other day when my nana was taking my little cousin to soccer practice, so I rode with her to be sure that everything went okay.  My nana has diabetes and has seizures sometimes, so we definitely try and keep an extra eye on her, even though she hasn't had a seizure in a long time, thank God.

 So, we're driving back home after the practice got canceled because of the weather, when the questions start flying at me, completely out of nowhere.  I mean, I'm driving and listening to the radio when all of a sudden one of them shouts out: "Michael, how come you don't have a girlfriend?"  That immediately encouraged the others to chime in, and before I even had a chance to respond, they start asking my nana why I don't have a girlfriend, which really made things, uh, interesting, to say the least.  Her response was something like because he's doing the right thing as opposed to the rest of my family who always screws first and thinks later.  In other words, she basically told them that I'm doing the right thing by getting my education and a good job first, and then I would worry about getting a girlfriend, or as she put it, get a wife and start a family.  I cringed as she made excuses for me, just wanting to blurt out that I'm gay, but I sat there and bit my tongue as we continued on home.

 Then, one of the little girls asks if I'm going to live with nana forever.  I have to admit that I blushed a little bit as this kind of embarrassed me for a moment, and once again my nana comes to the uncomfortable rescue.  She says that I can stay with them as long as I want to, and as soon as I'm ready to leave, then that will be fine with them.  Needless to say, I am and have been ready to be on my own for some time now, but until I get my career started and start making some money, I know that that is just not possible.  Thankfully, I have one more semester until I get my BA, and then another semester to get my teacher certification, so that time is coming soon enough, even though it feels like time is literally crawling forward as I question my own personal worth much of the time.  I hate having to rely on my grandparents for so much, and I'm just ready to get out on my own and start living my own life, and yes that means as an openly gay man.

  All of that said, I'm going to go ahead and get off of here.  The little brats just got me to thinking, and I can fully understand where they're coming from as not only are they little kids, but they are also confused as to why I don't live with my parents, why I don't have a girlfriend and never have, etc.  So, hopefully I'll blog again soon if something exciting happens.  Lord knows I could use a little excitement every now and then, so until then, I hope all is well with everybody.

So Hard

Hey folks.  I just finished with my school for the semester last week, so I've been doing some relaxing and thinking over that time, and as usual, I'm still trying to figure out when will be the best time to continue on with my coming out process.  Truthfully, I have a funny feeling that my coming out to my nana will happen randomly, as there are so many times, especially as of late, where I am so close to just filling her in, only to bite my tongue yet again and wait for that so-called "right" time.  I don't know... I just feel that she will definitely be the next to be told about my lifelong secret, and I'm thinking the time to tell her is just right around the corner, or at least I can hope so.  I've received a lot of advice to wait until I'm out on my own where I'm financially independent, and while that makes a ton of sense, that is so much easier said than done.  Every day seems to get more difficult than the last, and it's getting to a point where I feel like I'm just stuck, with no place to go whatsoever.  If truth be told, if I did tell her tomorrow, and if she filled in the rest of my family and they all rejected me, I would always have my grandma (the one I came out to) to turn to for a place to stay.  The only potential issue with that scenario is that I would possibly be flushing my school down the toilet with only a semester left until I graduate with my BA, but once again, I'm going to get that degree no matter what.  If I have to take next semester off in order substitute to save money for school, I would do that if I had no other choice, but then again common sense should tell me to just play it safe until after I graduate at the end of the year.

 The only problem with that is that I'm beyond tired of playing it safe.  I've been overly cautious my entire life for obvious reasons, but that has all been a lie, and it's just sickening to keep on living a lie day in and day out.  Not only that, but even when I graduate at the end of the year, I'm still going to have to work another semester in order to earn my teacher certification.  I met with my education adviser earlier today, and actually found out some pretty good news.  I'll be able to take a couple of the education requirements during my final regular semester, meaning I won't have a ton to do during the post-pursuit of my certification, so I'm definitely relieved there.  As he (the adviser) told me, it won't take long at all and it will be a whole lot cheaper to get 'er done after I graduate with my degree, so I'm definitely counting down the days until that happens for me.

 Putting all of my school and coming out thinking aside for a moment, I've also been thinking a lot about my future over the past week or so.  From my career, to wanting to start a family some day, to starting to date and explore the world I've known in my heart but never experienced firsthand, I'm just ready to start living.  I'm going to teach once I graduate, no doubt about it, and I'll just have to wait and see how I like it to see if that's what I want to do for the rest of my life.  As I've said on here many times before, my lifelong passion has always been writing, so I definitely would love to have that worked into my future before all is said and done.  It's in my blood, it really is, and it's something that I've enjoyed ever since I was a little boy.  In fact, I remember one time when I was in the third grade and wrote a paper over Pluto, you know when it was still a planet, that my teacher absolutely loved.  She even sent me to a neighboring teacher to show off my work, who also showered my with praise, which is something that sticks with me even to this day.  Over the years I've always been praised by my teachers when it came to my writing skills, but I just don't know how to expand on it.  I've always been better at communicating via writing or typing, I have a wild and crazy imagination, and I have so much to offer, but I simply do not know how to share what I have.  Sorry for tooting my own horn there briefly, but sometimes I have to remind myself that I am good at something, especially when you feel practically worthless much of the time.

  Moving on, I'm also looking forward to dating and exploring my options in that arena.  Obviously, and I've learned that I'm not alone by watching many YouTube videos here lately, but it is so difficult for gays (especially those of us who are mostly closeted) to date for so many reasons, while the vast majority of our peers have been dating since their mid teen years.  I've never had that chance, and I could never force myself to date girls, I just couldn't.  I've had plenty of girl friends over the years, but I could never lie to them nor to myself, and have an actual girlfriend.  Of course, like most guys, I've fooled around with a couple of girls over the years simply to try and fit in, but I always left moments like those with a sick feeling in my stomach, literally feeling ill for doing something to please everybody but myself.  I'd also, the more I think about it, like to have a family some day:  A good husband, maybe a couple of kids, and who knows, maybe even throw a dog or two in there as well.  In all honesty, I'd be content with just the first mentioned, but for some reason here lately I've been thinking I want to have a kid or two some day.

  Sorry to bore ya'll with my many thoughts, so I'm going to go ahead and wrap this baby up for tonight.  I'll blog again soon, and as always feel free to comment on any of my posts.  Until next time, I hope everybody is doing well and enjoying life to the fullest.  I know I can't wait until I can say the same thing.

So Ready

As I'm getting ready to wrap up the final week of this semester, I can't help but smile a little to myself knowing that I have one more frickin' semester before I graduate with my BA degree.  I spoke with my adviser the other day, and she said that I need just six more classes (18 hours) in order to graduate, so I'm definitely going to buckle down and enjoy that busy schedule come the fall semester.  I had actually planned on taking one or two summer classes in order to make my final semester less stressful, but I found out that it would be ridiculously expensive just to take one summer class, so that plan was quickly squashed by the money suckers at the university.  Anyway, I'm just happy that I'm almost there, as I am beyond ready to get my life started, a life where I can enjoy more freedom than I ever have before.  It gets so old relying on people all the time for pretty much everything, so I'm just excited to get the opportunity to grow up a little in the very near future.

The only bad news that came from my meeting was that I found out that I probably will not have all of my education requirements met before I graduate, meaning I will not get to jump right into teaching once I graduate.  I actually have a meeting with the education department in a couple of weeks, so hopefully we will figure something out, but it was a bit discouraging to find out that I probably won't quite have my teacher certification upon graduation.  I was talking with a fellow classmate a week ago about this (she wants to teach high school English), and she said that there are external options that are easier but more expensive than the one offered at the university, so I may have to check into those options as well.  All I know is that I've worked far too hard to be where I am at now not to get my teacher certification, so even if I have to work on this while I start substituting, I'm gonna get it done regardless.

Another thing that kind of made my day the other day when I met with my adviser was the praise she had for me regarding my performance in class.  I've taken several classes with her, she is by far my favorite professor, and she made it clear that she wants me to pursue my masters degree once I graduate with my BA.  This is coming from a woman who has been teaching a very long time, has her PhD in history, has written several books, and graduated from Yale.  So, yeah, getting praised by such an accomplished woman is definitely a great feeling, especially when she is strongly pushing for you to pursue higher degrees in a subject that she is literally an expert at.

All of this said, I'm going to wrap this up and get some much needed sleep.  I've been very busy the last couple of weeks as the spring semester is winding down, and I have a big test in English tomorrow, so I better get rested up to do my best.

Complete Bullshit

So, as I mentioned in another post a while back, I've really been having trouble with a general education speech class this semester thanks to a professor who seems to hold personal grudges when grading instead of doing so objectively.  I mentioned in that post that I received a zero for supposedly submitting my speech improperly the first time, even though he has told me that the way I submit my assignments has been fine the entire semester, and when I asked him about this he seemed offended, as if how dare I question him.  Anyway, apparently many members of the class were having problems with his submission policy, as he allowed (for the first time in ten years of teaching the class, according to him) re-submissions by those of us who received a zero, and needless to say he graded my speech extremely harshly, giving me 76 out of 100 points.

 Let me make this crystal clear:  I have not had a "C" in any of my classes since I have been probably in junior high school, so I was definitely stunned with this grade.  I didn't complain to him, though.  I studied his rubric extensively, didn't agree with much of it, but decided that I would just buckle down and do great on my second (persuasive) speech, and try to make up those lost points.  So, I decided to do my persuasive speech over gay marriage/rights, an issue that is obviously deeply personal to me, and an issue that I am obviously very passionate about today.  I worked my ass off for an entire weekend, on the speech alone, not to mention the outline and bibliography that I completed throughout the actual week.  I wrote a speech entirely from the heart; I let my opinion known, and backed it up with facts; and I made it personal by providing my personal story of being gay and in the closet in order to give it that element that really showed how important this issue is to me.  I took a huge risk by literally coming out to around 100 of my classmates, I just knew I did well on this speech, and I was very proud of the work and effort I poured into this assignment.  I mean, I literally fucking memorized just about every word of this speech, and only had to look down at my notes one time while presenting my speech.  It truly was coming from the heart.

  So, I check my grades online about an hour ago, and I noticed that my second grade had been posted.  At first I see a 95.5, and I'm extremely happy.  I really felt proud of what my hard work earned, but then I looked at the grading scale and noticed that it was a 95.5 out of 150 possible points.  My heart immediately sunk, my blood began to boil, and I really had to keep myself from sending him a heated email immediately.  But, I'm choosing to sleep it off, vent my frustrations here, and email him tomorrow to see why I was graded so harshly.  The only reason I'm not emailing him tonight is because he has this stupid ass policy (one among many) that says you cannot email him regarding grades until 24 hours after it has been posted.  Really?  Anyway, I looked at his comments regarding my grade, and this is what he said:

"Michael,

I appreciate the honesty and sincerety of your speech. You really walked the line on meeting the requirements of a persuasive speech as yours was mostly informative in nature. Also, you failed to include many of the components required of an effective speech (as noted in the rubric)."

First of all, for this guy to be such a harsh grader over pretty much anything and everything, I would in the very least expect him to know how to spell "sincerity".  Secondly, it's complete bullshit that this was more of an informative speech, and I really am offended by this comment because of all the hell I have gone through, and continue to go through, so I know I made my position crystal clear in this speech.  I mean, it's pretty insulting to be told that you're not being very persuasive when a topic is so near and dear to your heart.    Lastly, I really studied the rubric after the poor grade I received on speech one, and I made sure that I met the criteria this time around.  

So here are a few examples of how off his grading really is:  (1) My thesis was "poorly executed" and received only two out of five possible points, even though I am an English minor and have never (and I mean NEVER) received less than an "A" on any of my essays; (2) My transitions were also "poorly executed" even though I know that I moved from one argument to the next very smoothly and very effectively; (3) the organization of my main points were also "poorly executed" even though my arguments were "excellent"; (4) my eye contact met the "minimum requirement" even though I looked down at my notes one fucking time the entire time during a six and a half minute speech (this is one area that really bothers me); (5) apparently I also met the "minimum requirements" as far as rehearsing my speech goes, even though I literally fucking memorized the whole fucking thing; (6) another area that really boils my blood is that my reliance on notes was apparently excessive as I "poorly executed" that area as well, even though I looked down at them for a split second one time, while many of my peers were literally reading their speeches word-for-word the entire time (I shudder to think what their grades are if mine is so bad); and finally, my conclusion was also "poorly executed". 

 Look, I know I'm far from perfect in giving a speech, but I also know that I'm not nearly as bad as this guy is trying to make me out to be.  I'm willing to bet that I have a number of English professors (with actual PhD's) who would beg to differ when it comes to things like my thesis, my transitions, my organization of main points, etc.  I just don't get it, and I'm so frustrated right now.  If my email to him tomorrow goes nowhere, I'm definitely going to go to the department head to talk about this issue.  It's sad when a professor has to discourage his students and tear them down, as opposed to encouraging them and crediting them for their hard work.  It's guys like this one who make students of all ages hate school, and this guy seriously has something wrong with him.

 Anyway, sorry for ranting here, but this joke of a professor really got to me.  I mean, struggling in a general ed course when I've done extremely well in every other course I've taken at the university makes absolutely no sense, but then again, there is nothing much that makes sense when it comes to what this professor does.  So, hopefully tomorrow goes well, but if not, this guy is going to see a side of me that he wished he did not.

A Big Piece of Me

Hey everybody.  I've been as busy as ever this past week with school, and this upcoming week is going to be even crazier, so I thought I would come on here to give my mind a break for a little while.  Before getting to what I want to write about, I have to mention that one of my little cousins asked me again today why I don't have a girlfriend.  I just can't help but smile every time I hear them ask that, and it's pretty fun to play around with them and ask them why they don't have a girlfriend, which gets them to laughing and joking since they're only five years old.  As I've mentioned on here before, I come from a very large and close family, and I have many little cousins, and by little I mean five or younger.  The one I just mentioned actually has an identical twin brother, so I usually have double trouble when messing around with them.  Anyway, I was sitting down earlier watching TV when one of them asked me why I don't have a girlfriend, and let me tell you, this little kid was dead serious when asking this.  I kind of chuckled for a minute before asking him why he doesn't have a girlfriend, to which he replied: "Because I'm little.  Seriously, you're big, why don't you have a girlfriend?"  It really is amazing how the wheels are already turning in the minds of little kids, and I joked around with him a little before simply telling him that I don't want any girlfriend.  Surprisingly, this answer apparently satisfied him as he went on about his business, but seeing the innocence and curiosity of a child truly does make me feel good.  Don't get me wrong, they can be (and often are) annoying little brats, but they can also be the sweetest kids to be around sometimes.

  Sorry to get off track right off the bat, but I don't know, I've just been thinking a lot about me being gay, and how many people usually respond with things like they don't care what your preference is, or my personal favorite is the one where they don't care what goes on in your bedroom.  I fully understand how many straight people just don't get our situation, but it drives me up the wall to hear people say stuff like that, almost as if they are unintentionally diminishing our lives by saying that is such a small part of who we are.  For example, my grandma (the one who knows I'm gay) told me that she loves me the same as she always has, and to her I'm just the same old Michael.  While I appreciate the support, I feel like I need to let her know that the same old Michael is who I am trying to get away from.  The same old Michael is a lie, always has been, and the same old Michael was a tortured soul simply going through the motions as best he could in order to try and please his family.  I am beyond ready to say goodbye to the old Michael, and I can't wait to start anew, being allowed to be the true me for the first time in my life.

 Let me make this clear:  Being gay is no small thing.  It is not just a small piece of who we are.  It is a significant element in the makeup of who we are meant to be.  It's not just about what goes on behind closed doors.  When basically dismissing our sexuality in that manner, it is almost making it sound like something should be hidden because apparently there is something wrong with two men showing affection toward one another in a public setting.  It really does amaze me to think of the hypocrisy displayed by so many straight people.  The way I look at it, perhaps the only way to open their eyes even a little is by flipping the tables on them.  Tell them that their significant other is just a small piece of who they are; tell them that you don't mind their preference; tell them that what goes on behind closed doors is okay by you, so long as you don't see any crap in public.  When reversing the roles on them, maybe it will soak in a little about what we go through, but then again ignorance is such a tough disease to cure sometimes.

Here is the way I see it.  I am gay, I always have been, and I always will be.  I did not choose to be gay, I've gone through so many up and down stages trying to figure out why I am gay, and I have finally come to accept who I was born to be.  Of course I don't want to simply be known as the gay guy once I do fully come out, but at the same time I do not want to feel like I have to hide a big part of me simply to make those around me feel more comfortable.  Another example involving my grandma is that she was talking about a gay guy that she knows who is really crude by talking about bottoming, and things of that nature.  She said that she doesn't see me being that way by being so open, basically hinting to me to not go around bragging about what goes on beneath the sheets.  I was kind of stunned by this observation.  I quickly let her know that not all gay guys are like that.  There are many differing personalities in our community just like there are many among our straight brothers and sisters.  She was right, though.  I wouldn't go around bragging about screwing a hot guy, or discussing whether I top or bottom, but I let her know that I would have no problem showing affection for a boyfriend in public once I start pursuing my options.  I won't be afraid to hold another guy's hand, and I won't be ashamed of sharing a kiss in public, but it's just not me to get too personal about things that should remain personal.

I just don't understand the straight logic at times.  If you hear one gay guy spewing his mouth about his sex life, apparently that applies to a majority of us.  So, should we say that if a straight person talks about their raunchy sex to a number of people we should paint them all in that same light?  Of course not.  It's almost to the point where we are looked at like some kind of animals, beneath the normal straight folks, being observed in order to understand why we function the way we do.  Another great example is how apparently gay guys are ruthless sexual predators, constantly looking for their next prey.  Don't get me wrong, I think it's safe to say that many guys think about sex a lot of the time, but many of us are also capable of controlling those feelings or desires.  We're not lurking behind the bushes or hiding behind trees, waiting to pounce on and screw every good looking guy we see.

But, I digress.  I could go on and on with this topic, but I think I've made my point.  We're people just like the rest of you.  We live, we love, we feel, and we die just like everybody else.  We just want a fair shot like all of you.  We just want to be treated as equals, not like second rate citizens.  We want to be looked at as fellow human beings, not dangerous animals that should be avoided at all costs.  I now love that I am gay.  I can't lie and say that I don't struggle at times, but speaking solely for myself, I have come to understand and fully embrace who I am.  It's the other perceptions that I am worried about, and that is why I started working on that when I came out to my grandma.  She then told her husband (they're still working on their issues by the way), and he has treated me the exact same ever since he has known me.  In fact, if anything, he seems to be a little more open to me here lately.  I'm not sure if he knows that I know about him knowing that I am gay, but any way you look at it, it is incredibly encouraging to know that he hasn't dismissed me when he could easily do so.  My personal hope is that he and my grandma are the first two dominoes that are about to set off a chain reaction, and I can only hope and pray that the rest of my family embraces me as much as they have under these circumstances.  Perhaps then I can finally be me, and perhaps then I will shut the closet door behind me forever.

Certain Professors

So, I'm in an online class this semester where there is one professor who really likes to make things hard on the students needlessly.  For example, he has very strict demands as far as submission are concerned, and while I understand the need to keep assignments organized, he just takes it a step too far.  I did my first speech recently and was absolutely shocked when I found out a couple of days ago that I received a zero for  supposedly not submitting it correctly.  The only problem is that I have submitted all of my other video assignments the same way all semester, have received full credit for them, and had even emailed him to make sure that such submissions were okay.

  So, I email a couple of days ago to see what the deal was with my speech grade, and then the very next day there was suddenly a class announcement that re-submissions would be allowed this one time.  Apparently many students received zeros for not submitting their assignments "correctly".  But get this.  I get an email today in response to my speech email and he basically pins the blame on me by saying that I was lucky to receive credit for the prior assignments because they were also submitted improperly, and then had the nerve to make it sound like he was doing me a favor in saying that I am lucky that he did not go back and "correct" those grades with zeros for improper submissions.

  Now, I'm usually not the type to get into any back-and-forth with professors, but I have to admit that this email really rubbed me the wrong way.  So, instead of simply accepting this explanation and moving on, I decided to email him back, not to be disrespectful, but to remind him that he is the one who told me that my original submissions were just fine, so with all due respect, there was no luck involved when it came to those grades.  I hope I don't land on his bad side for the remainder of the semester, but I thought it was necessary to point out the truth and hold this professor accountable for his own words, or in the very least remind him that he makes mistakes just like the rest of us. 

 This brings me to a larger point when it comes to professors (and teachers for that matter) in general.  Some of these professors, for whatever reason, make the lives of students hell for no apparent reason.  Do they not realize that such crap is counterproductive, and only makes the students less interested in their class?  Do they even care?  Probably not, but here is my point as far as this is concerned:  While we are working our asses off to get an education and paying an arm and a leg in the process, I think it is only fair for you guys to do the jobs you are being paid to do, show the same level of responsibility and commitment that is expected of the students, and realize that we are only human and make mistakes sometimes.   

As long as our assignments are completed and submitted (mine all have been), why make a big deal about nothing and give a zero despite the fact that I did all the work and submitted it on time?  Professors like these are the ones who really turn kids off to school.  And professors like these, as demanding of their students as they like to be, are often the ones who do not demand the same from themselves.  Whether it takes them forever to get grades and feedback back, or whether they often miss classes due to "personal reasons", it makes me sick to see the hypocrisy displayed by them all too often.  

Sorry for the rant, but it just pissed me off to see this professor act like I basically didn't do anything to deserve a grade for my first speech.  What made it worse was when he said I was lucky to not have received zeros for submitting prior assignments incorrectly, even though he is the one sending mixed messages by allowing such submissions early on and saying they were fine, only to suddenly realize that this one was submitted "improperly", thus leading to a grade of zero.  Like I said, I hope this doesn't get out of hand, because if he continues to play such petty games, I will have no problem going up the chain of command until the issue is resolved.